Archive for the ‘Life Coaching’ Category

Emergency Preparedness: What We Must Learn from Japan

Thursday, March 17th, 2011

Emergency preparedness

Emergency preparedness

Emergency preparedness for radiation exposure from the damaged Japanese nuclear power plants is being assessed worldwide. The European Union is urging member states to examine Japanese food imports for radioactivity. Regulators in India, South Korea, Singapore, Hong Kong, and the Philippines are checking Japanese imports. Although no contamination has been reported, the U.S. Food and Drug Administration has increased radiation testing on Japanese imports.

In The Power of Positive Thinking, Norman Vincent Peale stated: “Expect the best at all times. Never think of the worst. Drop it out of your thought, relegate it. Let there be no thought in your mind that the worst will happen. You can overcome any obstacle. You can achieve the most tremendous things by faith power.” Unfortunately, many positive thinkers approach life with a false sense of security, and are poorly prepared for catastrophic or even negative consequences. Their positive thinking is often no more than wishful thinking and can be extremely dangerous.

Optimal Thinkers entertain realistic expectations and focus on optimizing situations within our control. We explore our options and make the optimal choice from realistic alternatives. When the stakes are high, we employ an optimal contingency plan against the worst-event scenario to minimize negative consequences. When evaluating risk, the probability and cost of failure (including the ability to cope with the consequences) are weighed against the cost and benefits of prevention.

Consider the Japanese nuclear radiation crisis: If a nuclear meltdown occurs, radioactive fallout would release isotopes that could attach to dust particles and enter the atmosphere. The radioactive materials would become water vapor, form rain, and then contaminate the soil.

Radiation fallout from a meltdown would result in contact contamination, in which radiation particles that settle on the surface are not ingested by either plants or animals. In this less-than-worst-case-scenario, immediate contamination of plants, animals, and humans can be eliminated with water.

However, when dangerous radioactive materials are ingested through food uptake as a result of the contaminated grass being ingested by cows, meat and milk will be tainted. This could contaminate our food supply. Contamination caused by caesium (Cs) is particularly dangerous, as it remains radioactive for around 28 years.

Here is an emergency preparedness for radiation exposure guide to best deal with possible contamination.

Life Coaching Best Practices for Passive-Aggressive Behavior

Thursday, January 20th, 2011

certified_coach1Would optimal thinking life coaching help you to deal with people who get away with overtly aggressive and passive-aggressive behavior. Some people are verbally disrespectful, offend others, and are socially inept. They use inappropriate language, off color jokes, and degrade others. Others use passive-aggressive behaviors to avoid taking responsibility for hurting others. They fail to take action when it is appropriate to do so. For example, when they make appointments with others, they don’t show up on time, or call ahead to ensure the other person knows they’ll be late.

Recently, one of my clients arranged to meet his new acquaintance, Helen, a wealthy business woman, at a Xmas party at 6 pm. He arrived at 5:56 pm and sat at a table in clear view, securing an open chair for his new acquaintance. Helen didn’t show up 6 pm or 6:30 pm. At 7 pm, when Helen was still a no show and hadn’t emailed or phoned, my client decided to call to see if his new acquaintance was okay.

At that moment, my client saw Helen seated at another table with a group of people. He was surprised and disappointed. Soon after, he and Helen acknowledged each other from a distance, without any verbal exchange. Helen made no attempt to speak with my client or apologize. Later, my client left the party with a friend. The next morning, Helen emailed my client. She apologized for having been detained at work, and said she didn’t want to explain herself at the party.

During his next life coaching session, my client shared this episode and his disappointment with me, I asked numerous questions including: “Why are you disappointed? What are you thinking or doing to create these feelings? Do you believe that money can buy class? What can you learn from this? How can you best adjust your expectations? What is your best strategy for dealing with Helen? What are best practices for dealing with passive-aggressive-behaviors? What are the most constructive actions you can take to prevent this kind of situation in the future?”

If you feel disappointed, hurt or concerned, and are ready to optimize — not just manage or improve — your relationships, emotional intelligence and self-reliance, feel free to contact me for life coaching in our Los Angeles office or by telephone. We’re here to support your best interests!

Optimize personal development with Optimal Thinking

Life Coaching to Optimize Your Emotional Intelligence

Monday, December 20th, 2010

“The man who makes everything that leads to happiness depend upon himself,
and not upon other men, has adopted the very best plan for living happily.”


Emotional Mastery mp3 Download

Emotional Mastery mp3 Download

Would life coaching help you? Many people wrongly believe that their best feelings are derived from external sources. They believe that if they get love, affection, understanding, or respect from another person, they will be happy. These people do not understand that that their best feelings are generated from within. Does your happiness depend on something that is out of your control? Do you believe that you need a relationship, material possessions, or an outstanding achievement to be happy? If so, you will inevitably feel unhappy.

When you honor your own feelings and use Optimal Thinking to optimize them, your happiness is completely within your control. You experience optimum emotional intelligence. You discover that an optimal connection with your feelings is the authentic source of your best feelings.

You can maximize your most positive feelings by exploring which needs are met when you experience them. Ask: What are my most important needs and what’s the best way I can satisfy them? Optimal Thinking is the ultimate mental tool to create those situations, circumstances, and events where your most beneficial emotions are felt and your needs are met.

During Optimal Thinking life coaching, you learn strategies to maximize your emotional life by yourself for yourself. If you are ready to optimize your emotional intelligence and self-reliance, feel free to contact me for life coaching in our Century City, Los Angeles office or by telephone. We’re here for you!


Life Coaching and Optimal Strategies to Overcome Loneliness

Wednesday, December 15th, 2010

Many people feel lonely and depressed during the holiday period. They feel disconnected from loved ones and unhappy with their lives. Are you willing to answer some optimal questions to best resolve these lonely feelings by yourself, for yourself?

Bear in mind, we all suffer the misery of loneliness at some time in our lives. You feel lonely when you experience yourself as separate and disconnected from others. You may find yourself observing the people around you, but are unable to participate. When the pain of your isolation is overwhelming, you feel heartbroken. Loneliness is an authentic signal of unfulfilled social or intimacy needs.

You can feel lonely when you are by yourself and have no one to connect with, or when you are with others who are emotionally unavailable. Loneliness advises you about emotional availability—whether you or others are emotionally open or shut down. You can gain understanding, and use Optimal Thinking to best resolve your loneliness by asking yourself:

• What am I thinking or doing to create these lonely feelings?
• Do I feel unlovable?
• Do I feel unneeded and different from others?
• Am I blaming my loneliness on what is unchangeable?
• Am I emotionally available?
• Am I trying to connect with someone who is emotionally shut down?
• Am I expecting more from others than they are willing to give?
• Is my loneliness informing me that I need to reach out and connect with people?
• What are the best actions I can take to overcome my fear of rejection?
• What are the most constructive actions I can take?

Many irrational ideas and assumptions lead to feelings of loneliness, including: “No one likes me,” “There is no one available,” or “I have to cater to the other person and there’s no time for me.” Question the validity of any self-defeating thoughts and explore what is in your best interest.

Minimize your lonely feelings with statements like: This is temporary. What’s the best thing I can do? Keep your focus on what you can and are willing to optimize. Being alone is a natural state of every living soul. If you enjoy being alone, you will most likely be able to reach out to others. Be true to yourself and understand that not everyone will love you. Loving yourself, sharing your love unconditionally, and communicating your boundaries to others is the best way to optimize your connection with them.

If you are experiencing profound loneliness and are willing to implement the best solutions, feel free to contact me for life coaching in our Century City, Los Angeles office or by telephone.  We’re here for you!


Life Coaching for Relationship Dependence Problems

Monday, December 13th, 2010

before optimizationCan life coaching with Optimal Thinking help you?  Many people did not receive the love and acceptance they needed as children. They feel inadequate, unimportant, unlovable, powerless, empty, lonely, bad, and even worthless. Instead of facing their painful feelings and healing their wounds, they focus their attention on their relationships. Do you please others in order to gain their approval? Do you become deeply emotionally attached to others before they have earned your trust and respect?  Do you have other relationship problems?

Many people hand over the role of affirming their value and lovability to other people and then feel wounded and rejected when others fail to make them feel valuable and lovable. When they don’t receive the approval they need, they blame others for their feelings of jealousy, resentment, hurt, loneliness, or disappointment. By allowing others to define you, you give away your power to them and then are dependent on their choices. Relationship problems arise because the foundation is rocky.

During Optimal Thinking life coaching, we have met numerous people who were brought up to believe that their role in life is to support others and that their personal goals and desires are secondary. These people feel selfish when they consider themselves first. Do you believe that you can only be happy when you are in a loving relationship? When your sense of wholeness depends upon being in a loving relationship, you are in a victim state. Making your happiness dependent upon others gives them the power to make or break you.

Harry, a business owner I coached, was miserable when he wasn’t in a committed relationship. By centering his thoughts and activities on his girlfriend, he avoided facing his pain and healing himself. Harry focused on his girlfriend’s feelings but ignored his own. He made her responsible for affirming his value and lovability, and for making his life meaningful. However, when he didn’t get the attention and approval he needed, he felt cheated and angry. He blamed his girlfriend for abandoning him, even though he was actually abandoning himself. When the relationship ended, he compulsively repeated the cycle with another woman.

During life coaching, Harry realized that whenever he attributed his pain to an external source, he was choosing to be irresponsible. Sadly, many of us choose the victim role by believing that life happens to us. If it hadn’t been for this, that, or the other, we would be doing very well now. Blame is the name of the victim’s game. We blame others for our pain because we don’t want to take responsibility for the source of our distress: our own thoughts, feelings, and actions. By volunteering for the victim role, we avoid personal responsibility for our choices and their consequences. As long as we believe we are victims, we don’t have to take responsibility for healing our pain. Until we accept the truth that our wounded feelings come from our choices and that we are responsible for the thoughts, beliefs, and actions that create our feelings, we will continue to feel powerless. It is not others’ behavior that is the source of our anguish, but our interpretation of their behavior and our responses.

You can give up your need for approval from others. Start by observing your victimizing thoughts and emotions without judging them, and consider how to best deal with them. Avoid the temptation of having others define you by asking yourself such questions as, “What do I want from others that I am not giving to myself?” Whenever you are angry with someone, ask yourself, “What am I doing to myself that I am blaming others for doing to me?” As soon as you realize what you’re doing to hurt yourself, you can take the best corrective actions. Here are some additional questions:

• Am I willing to take full responsibility for optimizing my thoughts, feelings, actions, and life?
• Is my greatest desire to learn how to take care of myself or do I want someone or something to do this for me?
• What do I need from an external source that I am not giving myself?
• What is the wisest way of dealing with this?

By taking full responsibility for defining yourself, you will claim your personal power. You can optimize trust, communications and mutual commitment in your relationships.You can also participate in confidential life coaching at our Los Angeles office or by telephone.