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  • Johnson and Johnson
  • YPO
  • Bristol-Myers Squibb
  • US Army
  • Air New Zealand
  • WB
  • Red Bull
  • Frito Lay
  • Mercedes-Benz
  • Delta Airlines
  • bp

Life Coaching Best Practices for Passive-Aggressive Behavior

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passive-aggressive behaviorWould optimal thinking life coaching help you to deal with people who get away with overtly aggressive and passive-aggressive behavior?  Some people are verbally disrespectful, offend others, and socially inept. They use inappropriate language, off color jokes, and degrade others. Others use passive-aggressive behaviors to avoid taking responsibility for hurting others. They fail to take action when it is appropriate to do so. For example, when they make appointments with others, they don’t show up on time, or call ahead to ensure the other person knows they’ll be late.

Recently, one of my clients arranged to meet his new acquaintance, Helen, a wealthy business woman, at a Xmas party at 6 pm. He arrived at 5:56 pm and sat at a table in clear view, securing an open chair for his new acquaintance. Helen didn’t show up 6 pm or 6:30 pm. At 7 pm, when Helen was still a no show and hadn’t emailed or phoned, my client decided to call to see if his new acquaintance was okay.

At that moment, my client saw Helen seated at another table with a group of people. He was surprised and disappointed. Soon after, he and Helen acknowledged each other from a distance, without any verbal exchange. Helen made no attempt to speak with my client or apologize. Later, my client left the party with a friend. The next morning, Helen emailed my client. She apologized for having been detained at work, and said she didn’t want to explain herself at the party.

During his next life coaching session, my client shared this episode and his disappointment with me, I asked questions including:

  • Why are you disappointed?
  • What are you thinking or doing to create these feelings?
  • Do you believe that money can buy class?
  • What can you learn from this?
  • How can you best adjust your expectations?
  • What is your best strategy for dealing with Helen?
  • What are best practices for dealing with passive-aggressive-behaviors?
  • What are the most constructive actions you can take to prevent this kind of situation in the future?

If you feel disappointed, hurt or concerned, and are ready to optimize — not just manage or improve — your relationships, emotional intelligence and self-reliance, feel free to contact me for life coaching via video conference (Skype or zZoom), telephone, or in our Marina Del Rey (Los Angeles office. We’re here to support your best interests!

Optimize personal development with Optimal Thinking

13 Responses to “Life Coaching Best Practices for Passive-Aggressive Behavior”

  1. Tim B says:

    Thank you for this article! It’s just fantastic to have someone in your corner. I was experiencing a few setbacks with passive-aggressive colleagues and these strategies and made me feel so much better.

  2. Relationship Issues says:

    My husband is incredibly passive-aggressive. I have enrolled for a life coaching session and will look forward to it.

  3. Fashion designer says:

    My mother is passive aggressive. Painful to deal with a person who hasn’t got the guts to admit their throwing punches below the belt. Good post.

  4. Carl Jones says:

    Passive-aggressive behavior has always been a problem for me. It’s hard to swallow. I enjoyed your post.

  5. Hayley James says:

    My sister is a big time passive-aggressive. She never takes responsibility for her low blows. I learn a lot from you. Thanks.

  6. Janka says:

    I do not usually suggest other websites but I’ll break my trend for this terrific post. Thanks.

  7. Home business lady says:

    My husband is passive-aggressive and it drives me nuts. I relate to this article 100%.

  8. Bryan Ponte says:

    I had a similar problem with a business competitor. He used defamatory comments about me to get a sale. He blamed everything except himself when I confronted him.

  9. Betty M says:

    Nice blog here.

  10. Brian B= says:

    This Blog was most helpful, your ideas are straight to the point, and the colors are cool too.

  11. Frank M says:

    Thanks for your post! Honestly I have never come across anything that hit the nail on the head like this post on passive-aggressive behavior.

  12. professional photographer says:

    I found your website while serfing. It contains wonderful and helpful posts. Its amazing to think one site could contain so much coaching and information. You are doing great work!

  13. Molly G says:

    You just saved me a lot of searching around. I’ll make certain to put this in good use!

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